There’s not much zest in these ‘Forbidden Fruits’
It’s evident from the first frames of “Forbidden Fruits” that I’m not the intended audience of young, flashy women with attitude it’s seeking to lure. And perhaps that’s why I found this movie so relentlessly annoying, a sort of retro Valley Girl concoction involving female empowerment through a combination of witchcraft and funky, barely there outfits that scream sex is not the enemy.
Given that it’s set in a glitzy Dallas mall and populated with characters who’ve viewed “Mean Girls” (filmed in the very same shopping center) a couple of dozen times too often, it would suggest we’ve rocketed back to Y2K. Except the ladies are all clasping latte-filled Stanley cups with Haute & Freddy blaring on the quirky soundtrack. So, which is it: now or then? It really doesn’t matter because “Forbidden Fruits” would be a bummer in any era.
It marks the debut of director Meredith Alloway, who, along with her co-writer, Lily Houghton (adapting her play), is hardly the sensation many of my colleagues are anointing as the next big thing. If anything, Alloway and Houghton are the human version of ChatGPT, pinching almost all their material off of “Mean Girls” and “The Craft.”
It begs the comparisons, right down to the unique monikers of the four members of the Fruits -Apple (Lili Reinhart), Cherry (Victoria Pedretti), Fig (Alexandra Shipp) and newest addition, Pumpkin (Lola Tung) – who are practically photocopies, respectively, of queen bee Regina, insecure Gretchen, ditsy Karen and totally normal Candy, aka the Plastics from “Mean Girls.” They talk alike, they walk alike, and they look alike. So, what’s the point? That imitation is flattery? If so, I don’t think that will prevent Tina Fey from contacting her lawyers.
But there is one difference. “Mean Girls” had a story. “Forbidden Fruits” is nothing more than four mildly talented young actresses looking fabulous while exchanging alleged rebellious, snarky dialogue, when not either mocking or ripping off the patrons of Free Eden, the exclusive clothing store they seem to reside in 24-7. They are literally always there. Well, maybe not just in the store, but inside the mall, be it the food court or a rival store, where the girls get frisky in the changing rooms with their gullible male admirers.
For the first hour, the movie is little more than multiple variations on the same themes of angst, frustration and a thirst for superiority over their feckless detractors. Oh, yeah, and the girls fancy themselves as a coven, able to cast hexes in the stockroom after dark. It seems harmless; more like pretentious. Until the final 30 minutes, when these spells start to come to violent fruition. That’s when the story jarringly shifts into full horror mode, with skulls crushed, buckets of blood spilt and bodies mangled in an escalator’s cog-filled equipment pit. Those darn spiked heels! They catch between the steps so easily!
Give the writers kudos for consistency, failing to render the satirical moments funny and the occult ones chilling. And did we really need this whole business of sisters battling to the death in a courtyard water fountain as a nasty thunderstorm begins tearing the mall apart? It might make sense to some, but to my ASD-geared brain, it merely left me ruing having acquired an awful tummy ache from consuming way too many overripe Fruits. Or, as Pumpkin is wont to say, it made me “vom.”
Movie review
Forbidden Fruits
Rated: R for nudity, language, brief drug use, sexual content, strong violent content, gore
Cast: Lili Reinhart, Lola Tung, Victoria Pedretti, Alexandra Shipp and Emma Frances Chamberlain
Director: Meredith Alloway
Writers: Lily Houghton and Meredith Alloway
Runtime: 103 minutes
Where: In theaters March 27
Grade: C-
